from now on my penis is your penis
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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