I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
