There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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