Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
