Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
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