Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
