we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize
