turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Randomize
