what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Randomize