God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize