ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
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