what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
How does one acquire holy water?
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
