Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
