If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
