would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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