god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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