You work out of a Hotel?
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Randomize
