I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize