i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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