If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
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