I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She swung at the pinata with crutches
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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