take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
