maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize