hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
