Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
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