My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
