Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Randomize
