He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
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