His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
