Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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