Christians are straight up FREAKS
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
