Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
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