I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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