I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
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