i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Randomize