Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
