Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
I'm at about main and main street
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize