I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Randomize
