Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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