what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
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