You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize