Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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