We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
