3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
You took a bar mat shot.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize
