I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
It's never too late to be topless.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
Randomize
