ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
