i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Randomize