Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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