I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Randomize
