Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
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