You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
