A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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